01 September 2016

5 Year Anniversary: What I've Learned From Sharing My Voice

This September, I will have been writing blog posts here for FIVE YEARS!!! Starting with this post

The experience has been extraordinary to me. I can't thank you enough for being a part of this. We've experienced a lot together, huh? I wouldn't trade it for anything.  


Today, what I've learned from sharing my voice:

  • What you say often comes out imperfectly. It's okay. People will usually still be grateful for your attempt to share. Our imperfection encourages others to be okay with their imperfection. Do you know how many grammar mistakes I have in this blog? haha.

  • There is enough room in this universe for ALL of our unique voices! I repeat: There is room for all of us!! What we have to say hasn't "been said already." What we have to say isn't better or worse than what someone else is saying. Our uniqueness is beautiful, and we should be sharing whatever it is we've got.

  • It's certainly not necessary to share your voice all of the time. I'm in favor of honoring your ebbs and flows. Sometimes moments call for retreating, creating, renewing. And that's a beautiful thing. There is no shame in this. It can sometimes lead to flourishing creativity.

  • Exercise/Movement and Sunshine seriously improve your creative abilities and brain power. (And also Fish Oils, Vitamin D3, and Vitamin B, in my case. These totally help me!)

  • Some people will love what you say, others will not. It's not necessary, ever, to please everyone.

  • "Finding your voice" is nonsense to me. As if your voice is somewhere else or needs to be crafted or strategized or correlated. Your voice is your voice. Whatever your voice needs or wants to say at any given time - well, that is your voice. "Finding your voice" is when things get so choreographed that your actual voice is no where to be found.

  • It's best to delete hateful words on the internet. They can surface anytime anyone shares their voice. I do feel for people who are in that state of spewing, but I'm also in favor of boundaries here. Because hateful words are just poisonous and they are polluting the internet everywhere you look. So I do my part and delete words like that on my site or social media - not just for me, but because of the energy they generate for others. DELETE. GOOD-BYE. (Luckily, this audience has been incredible all of these years. We feel lucky to say that our delete button has been used very, very rarely. Thank you all!!)

  • You do not have to be a writer or a professionally trained speaker to share your voice. While it's enriching to read an award winning essay or hear a viral Ted Talk, it's also beautiful to read or hear the words of someone's heart. There's room for all of us.

  • If someone does not like what you say, it does not diminish the value of it or the influence it has on others. Stay focused on those you are looking to connect with. Keep sharing! Share even more! Like-minded people will find you. 

  • As a woman, stepping into your power or sharing your voice threatens some people (both men and women). Perhaps you are a reminder to them that they don't feel empowered. Or perhaps you're a reminder that one might not have control over you. (These are just guesses.) But I've definitely seen that it can be uncomfortable for some to see a woman in the arena. I get it. I know we, as women, have historically been silenced, held down, and not valued. I get it that it can feel like a betrayal or a threat if someone breaks free (to any degree). May we forgive along the way, and continue sharing our voices and truths regardless.

Can you relate to any of these as you've shared your voice out there? I'd love to hear. 

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  1. Thank you for sharing your thoughts with me. I feel connected to you through them. I just read your very frist blog. I am not sure when I found your blog. I am glad that I did for sure. I love seeing pictures of you and Danny together, because the love that radiates just from the photos is amazing. I can only imagine what it must be like to be in the same room as the two of you! :)

  2. So grateful you have shared with us all these years! You are both radiant as Ruth pointed out!
    Mara I am wondering what you did to feel better when you were in your dark dark days? I am outbid energy and motivation. I have been working to improve for years with not much success. My physical health is still poor no matter my efforts and I still feel stuck in life. I'm wanting to give up and quit trying. I am lacking faith that things can get better. It's hard for me to believe so can bring forth goodness. I want to be done. Sorry for the heavy post, I'm just desperate.

    1. Hello dear - My heart goes out to you. I know going through a period like this can really test us- and it can be so frustrating to feel like you haven't yet cracked the code on feeling better. I want to recommend an incredible healer to you: Dr. Kelly Brogan. She has a website and a book called "A Mind of Your Own." She's wicked smart (MIT, Cornell, NYU) and she specializes in healing women of depression, which it sounds like you might be experiencing. She says depression symptoms are usually a result of inflammation in the body, a thyroid condition, or a nutritional imbalance...and she has answers and solutions. She helps people get to the BOTTOM of their depression. In her book, she recommends the blood tests to get and the exact diet to eat and the supplements to take to literally HEAL your body from the inside out. She pulls the curtain on anti-depressant pills and has an extremely convincing case for why these are doing more harm than good - and why they don't ever heal the body.

      Anyway, if healing yourself deeply speaks to you, I just can't recommend her book enough. She recommends working with a health provider to have the support while going through her program.

      In my darker days, what helped me the most was:
      -Going off gluten, dairy, and sugar (this seriously changed my life- and quickly. Dr. Brogan recommends the same protocol).
      -Guided Meditation.
      -Changing my mindset about my challenges and realizing they didn't need to be resisted -I could learn a lot from them.
      -Realizing I could choose to react to my challenges in a different way, with more love and virtue.
      -Taking my marriage, my future kids, and my security off the pedestal so that I could focus my energy on aligning with love.
      -Reading books that supported this path (at the time: A New Earth & The Power of Now. I would also recommend A Return to Love.)
      -Receiving love and belief from my mentor. (For me, I resonated with her much more than other therapists. I think the main thing is to just find someone you resonate with who can be part of your healing team.)

      I send you all my love and belief that you can get through this. Reach out to someone close to you - and find a doctor/therapist/practitioner to work with. Get your healing team in place. You. can. heal. You can feel better - don't give up. It just takes one step at a time. You'll get there. Much love, Mara

  3. Completely agree that hateful words are best kept to ourselves.


  4. GREAT POST! Wonderful lessons here :)

  5. this is an informational post about love. I love all human. thanks for your share.


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