I’ve had two husbands during my years of infertility.
I know very well what it’s like to interact with a husband over these kinds of issues.
Luckily Danny could not be more positive about the entire experience, which is contagious let me tell you.
May I present to you…….some things that Danny does that rocks my world:
- He knows what time of the month it is. He keeps good track of these things. He seems to always have a clue about when I’m fertile. I always think, “Does he write it on a calendar like I do or what?” I don’t think he does. But he knows. I barely have to think about it. And it means the world to me.
- He doesn’t hesitate to initiate. There isn’t any tension. Never a need for awkward reminders. Never a moment of thinking, “I’m the only one running this show.” There are few things worse than feeling like you’re the only one on top of things. (ha, no pun intended 🙂
- He talks openly about fertility as if it’s a family issue. Meaning, he doesn’t just sit there like it’s not his deal & look to me to do all the talking if it comes up. He has stayed in tune with doctor appointments and knows the answers to questions that come up from family and friends. I love his involvement and co-ownership of those discussions.
- He supports everything we’re doing to assist the process. I mean, everything. He’s willing to try all kinds of things. Even the really crazy ones. And he’s always checking menus & labels for me for gluten-free & dairy-free foods.
- He has no fear about adoption. None. He’d do it in a heartbeat. His open mind about that is a blessing to me.
- He tells me often what a good mom I am. Yep, he talks about the mom that “I am.” He always wants to give me confidence that I already have everything I need to possess that role. Never, ever, ever has he given me reason to think otherwise. He just exudes 100% confidence in me & tells me so often.
- And well, he enjoys the process….I mean, we are talking about baby-making. 🙂 Plus he just loves the idea of a family and he’s grateful to be working towards that.
Hopefully this list is helpful to any husbands out there. I know you guys want to do anything you can to make things go smoothly. You’re awesome for all you are trying to do.
Do you have anything else to add? Any great things your husband did or didn’t do when you were trying to get pregnant?? I’d so love to hear. And I’m sure other husbands would appreciate it, too 🙂
P.S. Here’s a link to another post I wrote for the Equals Record. It’s about a topic I haven’t yet shared on the blog & it’s about something I did when my first marriage was at it’s lowest point…
P.S. Sending a lot of love to “K.H.” – thank you for your life. You’re a beautiful and wonderful person with so much to give. Thank you for your email. We love you.
(Photo source: Eye Poetry.)
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