13 April 2012
Thinking of Motherhood...
When I saw these photos, I was overcome with thinking about what it might be like to feed a child. I tried hard to envision myself breastfeeding, staring at a breathing baby on my chest who needed nourishment. I tried hard to envision ME carrying a baby on my hip, having one fall asleep warmly in my arms, hearing a wee cry in the night and waking to attend to a little one (and actually wanting to), smelling my own child, letting it's little hands hold my fingers during a feeding, changing diaper after diaper and not being bothered, just feeling so motherly as I care for a new, young life.
I hope by making time in my day to have this vision that it will help motherhood to feel less & less foreign, despite the time that goes by. I know this may sound crazy, but I hope when it happens, that it will feel real and natural and that it will really feel like me, and that I will, indeed, feel like a mother....
And what about for you? Was it/is it hard for you to envision yourself as a mother? And, for you mothers....did you FEEL like a mother right away? If not, did it eventually kick in?? I think about this stuff all the time. So curious.
[These photos (more here) are of our amazing wedding photographer and her baby. I believe she was first pregnant about the time of our wedding in Boston. :) :) I just like thinking that it was a new, exciting chapter for both of us. Btw, Rachel will be in NYC for shoots the second week of May in case you need any portraits or commercial work done.]